Courage (Steal It If You Have To, but Try It)

Sometimes I look around and wonder how I got here.  Where did I steal the gumption to up and quit my job and fly to a developing country? And for four months?! I was contemplating this as I looked in the mirror, brushing my teeth as I showered (because bathrooms here are awesome enough you can do all of that at the same time). I’m not sure where I got the courage, but I am so glad I found it somewhere. 

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I have gotten to meet so many wonderful people in the three weeks I’ve been here. People with whom I’ve had only a passing encounter; or spent days exploring mountains and natural wonders; watched rainstorms and experienced the beauty of majestic rainbows; couldn’t communicate in words with, but I bought a handmade piece, and when we saw each other days later both our faces lit up and we bowed to each other in joy; little children who inspired stories to flow from my creative conscience once again; sharing the best homemade chai I’ve ever tasted; meditating with strangers as the sun set behind the mountains; being lonely and dragging myself up and out anyway and being blow away by some wonderful experience.

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It hasn’t always been easy. Night is often my greatest enemy – overwhelming thoughts and doubts have time to rush in, and I don’t have my furry best friend to hold and purr them away for me. Night is when I miss my boy, my family, my friends, and wonder what the heck I’m doing halfway around the world from them all.  When I find myself feeling this way, I know tomorrow is a new, and probably better, day waiting to be discovered and enjoyed to the fullest.  And I know if I become so miserable this trip is no longer worth it, I can always hop a flight home.

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But for now, I’m staying. Because new friends and adventures are just at the light of a new dawn.

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About juliamenn

Performer. Artist. Author. Lover of food and travel. Animal enthusiast. Avid reader. Globe-trotter.
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6 Responses to Courage (Steal It If You Have To, but Try It)

  1. Cuz Bill says:

    Dont u dare come home, just get hammered every night. LOL

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  2. Fun, adventure, growth, and who knows but what the Lord may give you some direction for the future as well, i.e., you can’t beat it. Enjoy and relish the whole experience. Love you.

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  3. Sunny says:

    Yep! So glad you get to do this!

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  4. cornishkylie says:

    I came to Thailand for 4 months too, I had the lonely lows (and you are so right – just get up and go out and exploring reminds you why you are there!) and all the doubts and the questions…now I am approaching my 3 year anniversary of living here! The more time I spent here and the less alien it all felt, the less I wanted to leave! Good luck on your adventure!!

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  5. Ro the Chai Walla says:

    Yay! Glad to have a read of your blog Julia, and really lovely to have met you at Shekina Garden.

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